Potential

Another amazing sermon at church yesterday. The pastor spoke about potential and asked us if we thought we were living up to our own potential.

He talked about how God must see us as a world. He must be heartbroken to see His people not living up to their potential; with all the war, hatred, hunger, neglect, abuse, sin, and depravity that our world possesses. Knowing He created His people with amazing potential.

It was then that I felt like God has created me with great potential that I am not living up to. He has given me the potential to be an amazing wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, and so much more.

I am often faced with the thought that there is so much more I could be doing for my children. I'll be the first to admit to you that I don't think I do all that I could do for them. I am not the mom that plans out the day with fun activities, nutritious snacks, and learning games. I wake up each morning without a plan, and just roll with it. I don't play with them the way I could. I justify this by saying that I have so much to "do".

I am not the wife I believe James deserves. I can be extremely selfish with my time, and my priorities. There is so much more I could be doing for him.

I am not the sister that calls as often as I should. That goes out of my way to help my brother and sister the way I could be. I don't pray for them the way they deserve and need.

I am not the friend that gives up everything to be with you. I don't return phone calls in a timely matter. I don't know favorite restaurants, movies, music, or hobbies. I am not living up to the full potential a truly great friend can be.

But the one that makes me that saddest and most convicted about is being a Christian. I am not living up to the potential Christ has given me to fully love Him. I don't spend enough time reading His Word, or praying, or helping the needy. I don't put Him first. I fill my life with "good things". Like my family, my Church, and my MOPS group. While these things are good things, He has asked that I put Him first. He asks me to put Him first in my thoughts, actions, and intentions. He has given me the ability to talk about Him to other, and I don't. I let fear of rejection cloud my mind, and I shut down.

This is not what I was created to be. I was created to be bold, outspoken, loving, kind, compassionate, and selfless.

While this post may sound like I'm being really hard on myself, I'm really not. In fact, I'm probably not being hard enough.

He has gifted me with talents that are just laying aside. It's time I use these for His glory and not mine.

I am so grateful for the sermon. I intend to live my life to my potential and I vow to listen to His directions, not mine!

"For God did not give us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline."

2 Timothy 1:7

~We chose this verse for Micah before he was born. Little did we know it was going to be a verse for our entire family~